Silver Jubliee Blues

Hi All

Am writing here coz am scared..period


I am like 1 week away from my Birthday..generally I'm like super excited almost a month before my birthday itself..i love my birthdays..I announce it to everyone..but this year is kinda different..this birthday is scaring the hell outta me.. this birthday am gonna turn 25..its gonna me my silver jubilee birthday and the number 25 makes me feel real old...am already getting jitters...I wanna run off and hide under ma bed...or mebbe jus turn back time if possible stop it for a while...
I am gonna be a woman...not a girl anymore..I will supposedly be an adult..and will have to behave more mature...This thing is scaring me to death
Im confident..I speak to the clients as if i have a Googled info of my company products...I travel like a hippy..I manage ma accounts..Shitt..I mus be really old to do all this all by maself...
Ohh my..now I will have the "Quarter-Life crisis"...
I have wasted ma 24 years doing nothng constructive..I do not have a own house..or a car..I have a bank balance that sucks..My job pays me peanuts...I am not married...My life is gone..Am screwed...
I will have wrinkles...the kids will start calling me "Aunty"...I will have no sense of the new trends...
I can sense the changes already..the people who used to all me baby have started sayin either madam or bhenji...now they wil start calling me bhabhiji or worse auntyji....nooooo..nahiiii...bachaooooo
I worry about bills...EMI's..insurances..taxes...I'm doomed

I wanna get back to school preferably Jr.kg or mebbe a play school
Me thinks me gonna have a serious nervous breakdown..

Yelllppppppppp!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Someone helppp me.....

Shit scared...trembling-------Old Me ( Btw Y am i smiling...)..Guess its a part n Parcel of 25..(not to know when to potray what kinda emotion)

Aakhir Bye Bye to a decade Welcome 2010

First of All Happy New year too All of You..Hope your 2010 started with a blast..and a nice new year resolution (dun ask me coz i neva make one..well am jus too confused to make one)..with a nice party and a hangover....hmmm....

Exactly a year back i wrote a blog for welcoming 2009..this is the link for it..
http://deepar85.blogspot.com/2009/01/bye-2008hello-2009.html

I was reading it myself and wondered so much has changed in 365 days...damnn for once I and my blog grew up..we kinda became a bit mature (we do swing to emotional crappies sometimes..but that is human)

The world saw a lotsa changes...We were hit by recession...Huge Finance tycoon leimann bros crashed and went bankrupt early this year...many companies were shut down..many people were laid off..many people didnt get a job...uffff....thats with the finance part
then we were hit by swine flu a.k.a piggy flu...it was supposedly originated somewhere in texas..(i still wonder what people did with the pigs to spread this deadly virus around the world..its was kinda funny to roam around the streets with that weird looking mask...
Then in the movie world or the celeb world we lost our music legend Michael Jackson..God Bless his soul..

Then we had the weirdest possible reality shows on brides n grooms (grouse and intolerable)
Ahhh....and my favorite part...I have got hooked to Facebook....and almost bid an adieu to orkut (i still am in orkut..jus guest appearance)

I am addicted to Farmville, PetVille in Facebook..I jus seem to get enough of my farm..its makes me go frantic when i feel that ma crops will wither off..i get desperate to harvest them (Dun gimme that look..i still have a kid deepa living in me)

Otherwise personally Ma 2009 was like mixed...good..bad..okok..very bad...very good..naah..none of these words suit..Ma mommy is searching for prospective groom...I got rejected by 13 so-called prospective guys...i almost got hitched to 1 but then I cried outta that one...
Ma best friend has stopped speaking to me..1 one my crushes stopped acknowledging my presence..
I have become whole n soul committed to my bank balance..relationships do not intrest me anymore (damnn wat am i sayin)..
Lotsa ma girl pals got married this year...n a few even have babies....*sheeshhh*
Ohh yea...I gotta a new job (applause) and my seat is bang opposite to the door from where i get to see lotsa hunky sailors *tch tch*..I have become smarter...wiser..n i have started watching my diet ( i do tend to indulge sometimes) and yea..i have started doin some cardios (for the 1st time in ma life).ohh yea...n I have stopped boozing and swearing...Am a good gurl now...Guess too much of I me myself..

Well now, goin back to the past..i mean 1 year back I was so hmmm different...I did stick to my resolutions "I do not have anyone in ma life" "I do not want love" "I am single""I did fuck crap outta ma life" well i didnt exactly live upto my last two resolutions "i did cry""i was almost treated like a doormat"..but that was long back....

Uffff......Guess that would be enough bore...Hope this year happens to be good...
Hope the same with you all too