Virginity Test

This topic might be repetitive. The topic is so compelling that I just had to put it into words,

I have shifted to another city, and I was travelling in a bus back home and I heard a group of guys in formals with a big IT company id cards hanging on their necks.

Guy 1: "Dude, but she has a past man, 2 boyfriends. am sure something must have happened between them da. How can I marry a girl who has already "done it"?"
Guy 2: "you have also done it da"
Guy 3: "so what he can do it, he is a guy, but she is a girl and this is marriage we are talking about not some passing affair, she is not a virgin and he is getting a used maal"

I was appalled, I wanted to turn and give a piece of my mind, but my stop just had to come.

We are in the 15th year of the 3rd millennium, claiming that India is progressing.
People flying to different parts of the world to work and study, science so advanced that people have started booking a land on moon but still we think a girl has to be a virgin on her martial bed.

Virginity is still a base to check a girl's morality. A non virgin girl is not supposedly a good wife material.

Its claimed that women have equal rights in the society, still white sheets are used on the first night to check if the bride is a virgin.
Men date many girls its ok
If a girl dates many guys she is a slut.

There is even a dialog in a movie "a girl is like a lock, should be opened with only one key. if its opened with many keys its a bad lock. A man is like the key if he opens many locks he is called the master key"
I mean, what double standards.

A girl who has had boyfriends and has had break-ups is tagged "easy", automatically guys start thinking its easy to "patao" her and take her to bed.

"easy" is the nicest words I am using here, there are even more cuss words that are used for her in Indian mother tongue.

Virginity is not an exam.. Its a small invisible tissue called hymen that determines virginity. A tissue that can rupture during cycling, workouts, jogging, running not just sex.

In an age where women are as educated as men, where they have male friends and colleagues. the age where she too has fallen in love and has had her heart broken in the past.
She too is just like any other boy.
She loves her family as much, She has pressures at work, She too wants a big degree and a lot of money and a big house and a foreign vacation.

If a woman gets promoted, she has slept with her boss

Google Images

If a woman comes home late, she is sleeping with her friends
If a woman parties, she is sleeping with strangers.

A woman who doesn't
fit in the "ideal girl" bill, she is a slut
Her "purity" is determined even today.
The day she has her periods, she turns impure for 20% of the month. But, they need the same woman to bear children for them, Enough evidence that India is the 2nd most populated country in the world and people talk about virginity.
Hypocrites

Holi for me

Holi is originally is a spring festival, a festival of colors, a festival of love.

Holi is a free-for-all carnival of colours, where everyone play, chase and colour each other with dry powder and coloured water, with some carrying water guns and coloured water-filled balloons for their water fight. Anyone and everyone is fair game, friend or stranger, rich or poor, man or woman, children and elders. The frolic and fight with colors occurs in the open streets, open parks, outside temples and buildings. 

I have been playing Holi from as long as I know.

I remember we used to have fierce competition with our neighboring buildings with water balloons, "who would bomb more balloons, It wasn't any less than an India vs Pakistan cricket match"

It was always fun to gather wood, paper, ghee everything for Holika fire, where all ladies of our colony would do pooja and promise to make us yummy sweets the next day.

Next morning, is the D day, the Rang panchami, colors, water, music, dance, friends, family, Thandai, mithai, and yummilicious food. 

And Bhaang, who can forget bhaang, Oh my God! Tasty intoxicating drink made of cannibi leaves, that drives people crazy.

There have been so many funny bhaang memories.

Hoil is all in all a total entertainment package.

It has its set of side effects too. 

Adulterated colors spoil your skin, people pelting stones at women in the name of Holi, putting colors on animals that effect them later. Deforestation for Holi fire.

Not good people. Not good at all

Its not nice to harm innocent animals.

Luckily, people are turning to organic and natural colors. Thank god.

Well, that is a generic picture oh Holi that I get when I close my eyes right now.

Pic Courtesy: Google Images

But, also this year I remember something  that happened to me,

So, Holi is on 6th and very enthusiastic people have already started playing Holi with colors.

There I was coming back from work in my pristine white formal shirt and my favorite trousers and my Guess bag, admiring my Cartier watch. 

*Stop rolling your eyes at my "branded" description you will soon know why*

Well, back to my Holi-day, suddenly out of nowhere a splash of colored water came and ruined my whole attire and as you know Holi Gulal does not, I mean does not go off your clothes, so there goes my whole outfit for a toss.

Off late I have been too lazy to go out to shop. 

Yes, seriously

And why not? Now a days we get everything delivered at home.

So, I log-in to Amazon through 27 coupons for obvious reasons. They have the best discounts and the choicest products from so many shopping sites. I get every product under one roof.

I had planned to shop for a shirt, a nice pant a bag and a watch. But, the collections were so good that  I ended up buying a watch, 2 bags, a shoe, 2 kurtas, 1 tshirt and a shirt that too without running a huge bill on my credit card. Yaay, happy wallet, happy me!

Thank you guys for coloring my outfit, else I wouldn't have had a reason to shop, not that I really need a reason to shop, but I can atleast justify this shopping 

Your wish is my command

Thank you www.baggout.com

Lets see, who doesn't want to be perfect for their partner. And what would be better then having the power to give them anything and everything they wish for.

I wanted to play Genie for a day, and my wish was granted for 14th Feb the Valentines Day.

I knew what my man wanted, I am Genie, no?

His eyes opened to a new shiny Apple Macbook Air neatly tied with a ribbon with a post-it "Its your day today XOXO"

He gleams and walks into a an already warmed shower, with his favorite "Kyoku shower gel" on the counter. he comes out all wet, steamy and super ravishing looking. He is invited by an aroma of his favorite breakfast "Filter kaapi and Plain dosa with sambar and 3 chutneys"

He is like "Woah, babe! what is gone into you"

Me: "Love, Love for you hun"

He opens the door to find a long stretched pristine white limo waiting with a uniformed chauffeur.

Stunned he turns and gives me the tightest hugs ever. 

In the limo, he gets a call on his phone from his manager saying "A, you are off today, there is some shutdown happening with our system. Have fun"

Smiling, he come to me and says "Babe, Is it you or is the world turning into a miracle today?"

I wink and turn back into our house.

I wear the best saree I have and ask him to wear a tux.

Me: "we have a lunch with someone important"

We drive in our limo to a posh looking house. With a look, of confusion he gets down and is greeted by his idol, "Mr. Kamal Hasan"

Astonished, he turns to me "Dee, are you kidding me, is this even real?"

me: "its your day love."

After a lovely meal, my beaming husband and I drive to a near by canal where a Venice styled gondola waits for us, with a bucket of sparkling champagne .

The boat rider, sings us the most romantic number while we sip our champagne holding hands. We drive back home.

The house, is all decorated, dim lit, with aroma candles, and romantic music.We go into each others arms and dance softly to the music.

The oven tings, to signal us that out amazing Italian themed food is ready.

Me: "I love to see you smile"

Him: "A day like this and a wife like you, I would forever smile"

After our amazing dinner, We set out for a walk under the star-lit sky, while I present the latest mobile phone and a large bouquet of flowers and get on my knees to tell him how much I love him.

He hugs me and we come back home.

me: "Happy Valentines day sweetheart, May you get all you wish for"

Him: 'I already have all i have ever wished for. YOU" *kisses me on my forehead*

Some days are perfect, sealed just with a kiss

This post has been written for Baggout's Blogging Contest on Valentine's Day. Baggout provides some awesome deals on Flipkart, Myntra,Jabong, Snapdeal, Amazon and 100+ other online stores.

Multi Level marketing - Con Con Con

As you would have guessed from the title, its a post about this huge sham that's going on MLM.

I was talking to my husband last night about this Multi-level marketing thing. This topic started because some MLM guy was consistently calling my husband on his phone. We had to threaten him of police complaint to get him STFU.

Like initially, a few people I personally know have fallen for this quick-buck crap. And never made profits but lost enough money over it.

Multi level marketing works like this, you buy this shit-load of crap giving a helluva money and try to sell it to whoever you can con and they buy shit load of crap and con someone and so on and so forth.

Its totally ridiculous, I will tell you how.

In Mumbai, there is this seminar that happens every Monday, where this suit clad men gather a few innocent stupid people and give a grand hare-brained scheme with very typical copyrighted dialogues.

I so wanted to pull a plug on at least one guy once, The scene goes like this.

This suit clad MLM guy rants a speech for 10 minutes "I am from IIM-A, I had a job in a very big multi-national company. I left my job and got into this and in 3 months I made more than I would make in 3 years. My at-home wife, is working from my home itself and makes almost 3-4 lacs in 3 weeks. Its very simple and easy. Anyone can do it. And this product has so many good features. Its a never-seen-before product. Its already selling all over the world. I and a few of my IIT, IIM friends are now bringing it into our country"

Then,

The MLM guy, takes water from a water bottle, pours it into a transparent glass, puts in 2 wires, positive and negative of a bulb and says "See the bulb didn't glow"
Then he takes a spoonful of some powder out of a "naturo" some jar and puts it in the same glass of water and again puts in the positive and negative wires and now the bulb glows. Now, this guy is like "If this powder can give so much energy to a bulb imagine what it would do to your body"
And people standing around him are in awe.
Im like duhh "Dude, get your head straight. Plain water isn't charged, even if you put salt the bulb will glow in any ways" 

The look on his face said, that he wanted to slap the shit out of me. And I walked off like a boss. *tch tch*

My husband shared his encounter with such, what can i say leeches.

MLM 1
My innocent beau, was eating alone in a restaurant, and this guy sits next to him and strikes a normal conversation. "Hi, I'm this, do u stay around here, oh, work might be hectic. We should get in touch, you can take down my number"
"Take down my number" here is where the victim gets caught.
My beau saved his number.
MLM guy "give me a missed call"

Exactly, after 2 weeks this MLM thing calls my beau and starts his typical dialogues "I am from IIT, My friends are from IIM, we have a start up and we are looking for highly intelligent investors blah blah"
My beau tried to avoid him like hell, but no, the MLM thind just doesnt give up.
Now MLM thing's name is stored as  "Chu**ya Do Not Pick"

MLM 2
Again my beau was in the same restaurant when another MLM thing came over and ranted the exact same, byhearted "IIT-IIM-Start up" dialogs. The MLM thing ranted for 15 minutes straight and my dude didn't open his mouth. then came the number exchange session, to this my beau says
"Sir, no offence meant, you seem to be a nice guy, but 2 weeks back a guy came over to me with this amazing MLM plan and I made a mistake of giving my number and that SOB has been pestering me like a crazy dog, you are a nice guy no doubt but I am sorry sir too many cons around" and wiped his hands and walked off. Like a true boss
(I went ROTFLMAO) at this.

Like seriously people, there is nothing called as quick-buck.
You have to work towards making money or inherit it.

Mumbai in my heart

It looks like i blogged eons back, my poor blog looks so deserted and lonely.
Well, sentiments apart, I really have been missing of the social network scene for about 70 odd days now.

No, I haven't taken any "no technology" oath, I just was caught up with a few major changes in my life.
The biggest change is shifting cities.

Now, the sentence "Mumbai is a city, Bombay is an emotion" makes perfect sense to me.
For me," Mumbai itself is an emotion and Bombay is a beautiful memory".

People who come from out do not like Mumbai because of the crowd and people to leave Mumbai for another city miss that crowd.

I miss crowded trains.

True that

I miss fast paced life
I miss that hub-a-dub at 6am on the streets
I miss open shops at 8.30pm.
I miss street fights and gaalis in Hindi and shivi's in Marathi
I miss my 8.12 (aat bara) local
I miss "Agla station dadar"
I miss the street food (Sandwich wala and his masala batata, chaat wala, extra masala poori, dabeli, Milkmaid gola, kulfi...i can just go on with the list)
I miss talking to strange women on train and not feeling strange about it

I just cant accept it when people call my city Bombay, I automatically end up correcting them that its "Mumbai"

Its awkward when I am referred to a "Girl from Bombay"
No people, I am a "Girl from Mumbai"

Its weird when I am referred to as a "North Indian"
Get some facts right people "I am from the Western part of India"

Its dumb when people ask "Do you speak Tamil at home or is it just Hindi (Indi as pronounced) or Marathi (Marathee as pronounced)"
Well, everyone in Mumbai speak their mother tongue at home.

It sounds weird to me when "Punjabi cuisine" is referred as 'North Indian"

Words fall short to describe what that city means to me now, tears roll down at times. Its, surely not a city, Its a deep emotion.
I am and I always will be a Mumbaikar at heart.

I miss home, I miss Mumbai

Daddy and His Baby

It is said that a girl is closer to her father than to her mother. 

For a daughter, a mother is an epitome of discipline, whereas, a father is like her partner in crime! 

There is special bond that a girl shares with her father; after all, he is the first man in her life. And, she is always a little princess to him. 

From infant to toddler to pre-teen to teen, a father sees the apple of his eye grow up from a little baby to a pretty woman.
From a little girl in pony tails to an elegant lady in a saree

But what happens when the time to search for her groom arrives. Dads start having the feeling of losing their gorgeous little princess overnight to some stranger who may or may not keep his angel happy. 

The mere thought of giving away his daughter to a person who he barely knows or has probably just met, starts giving him restless nights.  

From the start of seeing the groom, to the marriage preparations to the main ceremony. I am sure father's might be going through different emotions.

The excitement in his daughters eyes while shopping, the smile when she is talking to her fiance, the sad face when she doesn't get the exact shade of what she wants.
It makes him very happy as well as sad, to think that the time for her to leave him is coming nearer.

  

On the day of her marriage, all the memories from her childhood to now, even those forgotten memories flash through his life, like a photo album. 

During the Kanyadaan, father goes through a wave of emotion in this biggest moment of his and his daughter's life. That moment when its time for him to finally accept that there is going to be another man who will love her and protect her.

Silently, he wishes that this man loves, cares and protects his daughter more than daddy can does. 

When his daughter steps out of  her parents house as "Miss" to become a "Mrs" she leaves a gazillion memories in that house.

With tears in her eyes, when she turns back, she sees a man standing in the corner with sad red eyes, trying hard not to cry.
When she comes and hugs him, he doesn't see the bride, the grown up woman but he sees the little girl who used to hug him. He sees his little baby.

And a single tear rolls out from his eyes.

He is the father of the bride

Daddy's are always the daughter's first hero -Google Quote
A son is a son till he finds a wife, but a daughter is a daughter all her life-Google Quote

She Waits

This post is written for Five Sentence Fiction (FSF) - Waiting as the theme

Every time she sees the mail van, she runs to the door.

There is a hope in her eyes for one letter from him.

To see that hope shatter, can break even the toughest hearts.

She looks up, and prays for his safety where ever he is right now.

She is his mother, who waits everyday for her Army Captain son to return.

Image Courtesy: Google Images

20 Girl Thing's

This is a typically Girl-Thing. Like, we girl do a lot of things. But sometimes I wonder if am I the only one or every girl does these weird things at least once sometime..

Here is a basic list that I could come up with

#1 Getting up in the morning and thinking an excuse to take an off, but dress up and leave for work anyways

#2 When hair falls in the shower and when I don't want the drains to get clogged, I swirl it and stick it to the bathroom walls and then throw it later

#3 Stick bindis on the inside of my dressing shelf

#4 Adjust bra straps when we think no one is looking

#5 When someone gives us a stare the first thing we look is our cleavage, then say to our self "Its not too deep, is it?..Naah it isn't"

#6 Trying a super cute shirt in the dressing room, realizing its too small and you are half stuck into it and panic that the shirt might rip off somewhere

#7 Open your mouth really wide while putting on kohl, or eyeliner

#8 Swirled 360degrees in front of the mirror and admired self

#9 Street shopped stuff, then try them at home and regret buying some stuff

#10 Have clothes in your closet that have been worn just once for a few hours

#11 Have clothes in your closet that are just there as long as you remember and you have no heart to throw them

#12 Removed the bra through the sleeves of a tshirt or dress

#13 The first thing that you do after reaching home is, fling your bag, next item that goes off is the pants, and then feel relaxed

#14 Measure to see if our hair can cover our breast

#15 Feel sense of freedom, after taking off the bra at the end of the day

#16 Check if the nipples are jutting out of the tshirt, and if they are curse it and try to hide them somehow

#17 Give a head-to-toe check of other girls and compare their outfit, shoes, bags, accessories with self.

#18 Sucked tummy in and imagine how a washboard tummy would look like

#19 Wear a super cute dress but change it because a small paunch shows up from the side view

#20 Wear long sleeve shirts to cover the hair on your hands, only because you are too lazy to wax them off

Picture Courtesy: From an old post of the same blog

Traffic Jam Honking -HORN STOP PLEASE

Picture this:

Traffic Jam *beep bonk paaaa peeee poooo beep beep beeeeepppppp*

Does it sound normal to you? then, my friend you are in India

Bloody inconsiderate people, you know you are in a traffic, or a red signal, honking like a mad person is not magically going to make way for you.
Neither can go drive on the heads of other cars and go ahead, then why can't you just stand there patiently instead of pressing that horn so hard than it goes right in and comes our of your bonnet..Like seriously, I don't understand..What is the hurry?

Its not that you have a dying patient or a pregnant woman in labor in you car..then why that crazy honking.

Do you realize how annoying you sound?

Using that horn during an emergency is valid
Using that horn to notify that you are in full speed in a junction is valid.
Using the horn to warn some idiot crossing is valid.
Using the horn to make the person driving in front of you realize that the road in front of him is empty and he is blocking you is valid.

But, honking for no reason....Dudes..and some Ladies, get a life....get some etiquette's..else stop driving...you don't deserve a vehicle


Image Courtesy: Google Images/Traffic Congestion in Mumbai

Peeaceful

I have this thing, a phobia or what I don't know what it is called
I cannot pee in unclean toilets outside my house, like petrol pumps, shops, hotels etc.

Recently, I had gone with my family to this new city and we left at 4am in the morning.
After, that I hadn't had a leak for more 18 hours straight (Yes many reading this will go TchTching that it isn't good for health, I know it but cant help it)
On our way back, it was supposed to be a 5 hour drive.

I so badly wanted to relieve myself that literally I was looking like one of those cartoons that bite their lower lip and have tears of desperation in their eyes and is jumping from one foot to the other.

By God's grace, we found a decent hotel, and I ran to the "Washroom" to see a long line of women waiting.
I was ready to go on my knees and plead to those women to break the queue or me. I explained my situation and the nice ladies allowed me

Trust me, peeing after holding it for so long and that too when you are on the verge of having a bladder blast is true bliss.

#TrueHappiness #Blessing ..lol

Image Courtesy: Google Images

Mumbai Local Bytes

Almost 80% of people who travel in Mumbai local might have been through a few mishaps. That is kinda pretty normals and acceptable considering the crowd during peak hours.

I am those core niche people with whom silly mishaps keep happening in regular basis.
One in a week
One in two weeks
Frequency depends on Lord Shiva's mood, whenever he is bored he plays a trick with me.

Now I thought of listing down His tricks on me,

#1
Leaving 3 trains because they are too crowded, messing your hair in that process and forcibly getting into the 4th train, pushing, panting, screaming, and getting out of the train as if a building collapsed on me

#2
Standing in the crowded train looking like a combination of Statue of Liberty and Leaning tower of Pisa

#3
Getting elbow punched on the gut, on your face, nail marks on hands (no i didn't get into a brawl, too much crowd and women were "adjusting" them selves")

#4
Handles of my handbag ripped, wires of my earphone ripped, that rubber round thing on the earphone lost a gazillion times

#5
Kurta torn

#5.1 One aunty couldn't get into the train, so instead of holding the handle she held the collar of my kurta and pulled it.......
#5.2 Protruding nails on train got stuck somewhere and made a cigar burn size hole in one of my t shirts

#6
Learning so many new cuss words
Survivial instincts at its peak

And the ultimate, Epic mishap

#7
Slept in train
Reached Virar
Reached Ulhasnagar
Reached Thane
Reached Dahanu Road, returned reached Bandra (full 2 hours of sleep)




This is it, Trained Life of DeeDee

Happy Birthday Lord

This post is written for FSF-Five Sentence Fiction topic Innocence

Mary's 5 year old son Barney was curiously looking at the beautifully decorated Christmas tree.
The aroma of the freshly baked cake and tasty delicacies filled the whole house.
Barney to his Mom Mary "Why do we celebrate Christmas?"
Mary "It Jesus Christ's Birthday, just like you celebrate your birthday every year"
Barney still curious "How old is Jesus Christ?"

Holi After Effects

Define Bhaang - Bhang (Hindi: भाँग) is a preparation from the leaves and flowers (buds) of the female cannabis plant, consumed as a beverage in the Indian subcontinent. - Courtesy Wikipedia

Yes, It was Holi yesterday (17th March 2014) and I love Bhaang.
I eat bhaang, I drink thandaai  and I feel all screwed up the next morning


18th March 2014, 9.45am
Place: Work

Oh fuck, my head, its blasting
I look like a zombie. I feel like a zombie. My brain is dead. Im making no sense.
My limbs are falling off.
Im in a trance state. I have no idea how I got into the train and reached work. Auto-pilot mode.

My hair looks as if I just stuck my finger in a plug point.
My eyes is droopy and so is my head.

I might just fall flat on my face anywhere and sleep.

Om Namah Shivay

God, Im so Bhaang-over, Help me through the day
and I wissssss.......zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz *falls flat on the desk*

Picture Courtesy: Google Images

Lucky and Alive

One day.
One Semi fatal accident in the middle of nowhere
Saved by some strangers in a bloody semi-concious state.
Feeling dizzy, opening the eyes and overhearing Mom saying "My baby is alive. Thank God, My baby is alive"
For once, I feel like I touched heaven and came back.

This post was written for the Five Sentence Fiction - Lucky for Lille McFerrin

When do you plan to get married?

The inspiration for this post came from this article i read on http://bbc.in/1jQkrJ9

I thought I was the only one who was going through "old enough to have babies but still aren't married thing"

There are so many others our there going through this syndrome, not just in India, in China too.

"Ideal" age for a girl to marry is till 25, post 25 she is "old"...Like seriously? Are you fucking kidding me?

Every time a younger girl gets married and we get that glossy invitation at home.
My Dad has this "Why-not-my-daughter" look and Mom being Mom makes her concerns more audible "Look, kids younger to you are getting married"

Mom and Dad check the matrimonial websites and books, "See that, they are  searching for a bride for a 25 year old boy"
"Dee, You have to marry soon, else no one will give a second look at you"

Well, I look younger to my age, Yes I really do!
And, I don't get just 2nd look, I get the 3rd, the 4th, the 5th.....looks, So that concern is eliminated


I very regularly keep getting these comments like

"What are your plans for marriage?" (None of your business)
"Ahh, Next is you" (Thanks, for letting me know that Crystal Ball)
"Shadi ka khana kab khila rahi hai?" (Itna khayega phaat jayega fuggge)
"She got a husband, you will get one soon too, don't worry" (Who's worrying?)
"You have to lower your expectations" (Do you even know what are my expectations?)
"You have to adjust a bit" (Oh yeah, I can see how adjusting you would be for your daughter)


Every girl, has a checklist in her head for her mate. I have a set of decent expectations too.
No I don't want a hot, drop dead gorgeous hunk who drives his Daddy's Merc coz I know I ain't no sexy hot diva.
My expectations are just decent...like perfect in my head

When my parents started the search for me I was about 22-23 then for me only and only looks mattered "Broad shoulders, Nice eyes, Nice mane...nothing else really mattered..neither the family background, nor his job, nor his finances nothing" 

Then "Looks took the back burner, that doesn't mean I was looking for a tad ugly guy, but priorities changed for sure"

I get lines like "Why don't you find a guy for yourself?"
Well, to start with..
I'm lazy to find a guy
I don't know how love feels like
I don't trust my choices
I want my parents to to do the dirty work of finding themselves a Son-in-law

Its not just the elders who poke you with questions, Its even people from your own age or younger pinging or asking you on Whatsapp
"So, hows the groom searching going?"
(Stop looking for gossip)
"Have you got anyone yet?"
(If I did, I wouldn't be tagged Single)
"You should go to weddings and check men out"
(Sorry, I'm too busy checking out the food counter)
"Buddhi ho gayi tu, shadi karle jaldi" (BC....)


I have everything I want in life, a loving supportive family, lots of admirers, enough moolah for shopping and vacations.

Now at 29, I don't feel old.
Yes, I feel matured. I know am ready to marry. I know what I want from life.
But, I want a man who is of my choice. I don't want to marry out to pressure of "others are getting married"
I'm not desperate to get hitched.
I know my wait will be totally worth it

POINTS TO BE NOTED

People who are trying hard to hitch me up. Give up. Like seriously, Give up. If I want I can hitch myself up, but I don't want to

People who ask me about my wedding plans. Ask only If you are planning to share the wedding and shopping expenses. Else, Refrain.

People giving marriage advises. According to you, I should be having a baby now huh! That means I am mature enough to handle my life, Right? SO let it be, If I ever wanted an advise, I would ask. So, Thank you and No Thank you

People who ask me my marriage plans, You have no idea how brutally I'm murdering you in my head. If you don't want to be murdered in real then save your self by STFU. Thank you

30 is the new 20, Fuck the biological clock. Science is advanced enough to help women have babies late too with minimal complications. So, that clause is also eliminated.
Now, I got just one sane reason to marry, and that reason happens to be whenever I want to...

Phew!!! Was I venting out or what and I still am not done yet......  
To be continued to next time I get start feeling like venting... :D

The Seduced Forbidden Fruit

She knocks his door and stands seductively as he opens the door for her.
Clad in a transparent low waist saree, flaunting that wet look hair-do, that slim chain over her slender waist, well koeled eyes and glossed lips and that low back, deep cut blouse made a perfect picture and enough to give him an instant hardness in his pants

Lying on the plush couch, talking in soft tones in a dim lit room. The soft music is in the air.

All he sees is her shiny glossed lips when she talks,
How would it feel on his lip?
How would it feel to probe my tongue tasting her?
How would the lips feel after the gloss is off?

Her long, well painted nails, trailing the front of his shirt, he felt his heart thumping so hard that the her finger might just burst it out of his chest.
He wanted to feel the long slender fingers pressed up on his chest, when he is above her
How would her moans sound when he kisses her, holds her by her waist and pulls her to him?

The saree, moves just enough to get a good view of the perfect molds of her body,
How would they feel in the curve of my palms, What color would it be, Dark brown? Pink? Light brown?
How would they feel when his tongue moves over it?
How would it feel to roll it in between his thumb and the index finger?
The thoughts were driving him crazy

How would it feel to dive deep inside her?
How would her warmth feel on him?

He wanted to feel her legs around him, intertwined and head thrown back in passion.
He wanted her then and there.

But, he couldnt have her
No he would never have her
For she is his Forbidden Fruit,
She is his wife's bitch best friend

The Ganpati Dance

Everyone has their own choice of music and dance moves.

Some like classics, rock, trance, metal, Legendary Kishore da and Rafiji
Some like mosh pits, head banging, Gangam style, Dabang style, Harlem Shake style moves everyone has a unique step.
I like them too.
Actually my choice of music is mood dependent.
Im more of a Bollywood music fan, a Hindi, off late a few Punjabi music fan.

But, deep down in me, I love like totally dig the rickshawala songs
Totally dhinchak, feet tapping, known as Ghati music....but I love it

I love sleazy item numbers too and my choice of such music have been evident from the time I was a kid . then I didn't know the meaning of a few songs but still used to scream them out loud much to the embarrassment of my parents.

My top favorite songs then were
"choli ke piche kya hai"
"sarkhaye liyo khatiya jaada lagey"
"sexy sexy sexy muje log bole" (My mom used to say...dont say sexy..its a bad word)
"Dhak dhak karne laga" (with the booty shake moves)
"Rukmani Rukmani shadi k baad kya kya hua"

No, I didn't have any freakin clue what any of it meant all I knew was Madhuri dances well and her bangles were lovely "KuK Kuk Kuk Kuk" sounded super cool
oh oh oh oh in Rukumani sounded awesome.

Every time I had a pillow fight I used to sing this "Sarkaye liyo khatiya.."
Even now, during chilly winters under the blanket I mumble this song.

I just totally love Ganpati dance.
Whenever wherever I hear the beats my shoulders start the jiggle.
I almost moved standing in one place at work too when I heard the music. If I weren't at work and if I it wasn't for the "good girl" image at work. I would have do started doing the "dhatara dhatara" moves right there.
I have to confess, I did rush off to the ladies washroom and danced for 2 minutes straight.
I have even gatecrashed baraats (wedding processions) playing this music danced and gone back to walking towards my destination.
I don't mind breaking into a Ganpati dance or a Nagin dance or a "Bhagra" in a high-end pub's dance floor. It gives me an immense adrenaline rush.

How can anyone forget the Nagin dance, snake shape hands over you heads and gyrate like a drunk snake is silly but so much fun
After dancing, I'm the most happiest self.

My all time favorite tracks are
"One two ka four, Anil Kapoor's Dhina Dhiin Dha"
"Dhagala Lagli"
"babuji zara dheere chali bijli khadi"
"dhagala lagli"
"aa re pritam pyaare"
"Nakka Mukka (Tamil Nakul version)"
"Aa Ante (Telegu Song")
"Baghtoy Rickshawala (Marathi song)"
"Patti Rap - Humse hai Muqabla"
"Urvashi Urvashi"


There are more but I can just remember these

To sound cool, I do have a few Trance, Metal, Soft rock that I hardly listen to.

But, to pep up my mood..I need my dose of "dhatara dhatara dhatara" on regular basis.

That is me the total "desi girl" :D


Image Courtesy: Google Images

With Love from Dad

THIS POST WAS INSPIRED BY MY APPA

Dear Little Daughter,

You have grown so fast.
I still remember you wrapped in a soft sheet, all pink, like a little angel in my hands.
I knew I loved you from that moment on and I sweared to myself that I will protect you forever.

You had me wrapped around your finger then on.

Appa with his little girl ages back

Your crooked smile means the world to me.
You are all grown, but still you shall always be my little baby.

I cant ever forget, your first words, your first step.
The times when you held my finger with your tiny hands while crossing the road, that touchy words "Appa, I will keep you safe  on a crowded street, hold my hand"
The times when I used to dress you up for school.

I remember our petty fights too. Many times I have been so very angry with you.
But, still when you cry, the tears are enough to melt my heart again for my little baby.

Even the thought of your accident and the pain you went through kills me inside.

Some day, a boy will come along asking me for your hand. I wouldn't say "yes" till im sure he can keep the apple of my eye happy.
I want a man for you who would love you more than I do.

Little Baby of mine. All I wanted to say is "I love you"

From,
Appa

A date with my coffee

Going to Starbucks with friends-nice
Getting tagged by friends-dumb
Ordering your regular coffee without seeing the price-stupidity

I'm a big coffee person, and being a Tamilian may have something to do with it maybe.
I love my coffee sweet, medium strong, milky and frothy and more importantly made in front of me.
So,

I was on line in Starfucks today, stupid coffee place that charges 300 bucks for a coffee..and some strange obsession to see my coffee being made I stood there in front of this glass counter staring at that machine, and this guy with a pony tail with a bored expressionless grumpy face pressed a few lit buttons and "brrruuuuzzzz" the machine puked out a few liquids in a soup bowl size mug got filled with something like a little baby;s diarrhea   (I'm not sorry about my gross description) Its exactly how I felt when I saw the coffee being made. And I picked my cup of watery, not so enticing coffee and passed it on to this teen girlfriend of a friend who swears by Starfucks.

The later that eve,
I go out with my brother, to this small open air coffee place (Tapri in Hindi) on the corner of the road with rickety wooden benches, even before we went near the coffee place, the smell of freshly ground coffee was in the air. That tantalizing aroma.

Filter Kaappi (coffee)

We ordered for two coffees and a kind looking man smiled at us, called for his wife and said "make coffee for our guests"
Guests? He could have aid customers but no..we were his guests and were treated like one 
She then  started making our coffee so beautifully as if it was some delicate piece of art, she put the freshly ground coffee, then sugar and mixed them well, them put in warm milk and frothed it (1 meter coffee) for 3 minutes and gave it to us in cute stainless steel tumblers.
That coffee..... my friend, was heaven, the authentic filter kaapi (Pronunciation: Kaa-pee)...Bliss...It actually took us to another world altogether.That aroma,..That milky coffee flavor..That sip that energizes every cell in your system
To top it all, this amazing coffee cost us mere 8 rupees

Its not how big the place is, Its not how expensive things are.
Its the affection, the expression, the love that you put in what you do for others reflects in the job you have done.
People don't need AC's and Big cushion when they have actually come for a cuppa coffee...
Big chains Coffee places, should change their name to gossip places...

Image Courtesy: My Samsung S-2 plus camera

WOW - With Love

Its end of January and like every year for the last few years, I have started shutting myself off. Being single during the first half of February, especially when all your friends are couples is totally a dreaded prospect.

31 year old, slightly plump, with little flab around the waist, Yes, that's me. Single, virgin and bored with my life as a librarian meant for senior citizens in a deary old skeleton building.

I have always dreamt of having this perfect boyfriend, who would surprise me with things, take me to movie and dinner dates, whisper sweet nothings to me.
But, for now all that seems to be just a dream.

Every pre-valentines, the shops get laden with all heart shape toys, cards, pillows. I do make a face and walk off as if they don't make a difference to me, but in real it makes me scream inside "I want them too"..

Then came, that dreaded day..the 14th of February..Flower vendors making displays of red roses, heart shaped bouquets, couples air-kissing, chics blushing at their men who are proud about the gifts they got. Those lavish plans that my friends have boasted that their men have planned for them.
So many people in my train on leave, and are on special valentine's day holiday.

Phew!! With a huge sigh i entered my dully lit library, and plonked my big brown tote on my rickety table, that creaked with the weight of my bag.
Suddenly, my eyes fell on a well wrapped box on the leg of my desk.

 ‘I was surprised to see a parcel with my name on it.’

 Like I have never ever received a parcel in my life, and never a well wrapped with a red satin ribbon bow on it.
With all my mixed emotion, I grabbed the card that was stuck on the box.
"To the love of my life.....from, A"

My hands automatically flew to my mouth, a happy tear stung to the corner of my eye.
"Darn, I recognize that handwriting,"..""Oh lord, after so long....he is here....and f*** he loves me...."

I wanted to jump high and punch the air,scream out loud "yaaaayyy..." but i just stood silently there with the box in my hand...thousands of emotions exploding in my head..

Slowly, I looked up at the picture of my Lord Shiva  and said "I'm finally going to have a Valentine..Thank you" with a smile of my face

This post is a part of Write Over the Weekend, an initiative for Indian Bloggers by BlogAdda.

His Phoenix

He was out on his well-deserved vacation with his friends to this very popular resort.
The early morning breeze, the softness of the sunlight pouring through his window warmed up his chilled bones.
Came hell or high water, he being a disciplinarian, did not break his routine of having his morning jog, only today instead of his concrete jogging track he jogged along the beach.

That early morning he saw a shadowy figure going inside the waters, he curiosity knew no bounds, that lithe body, elegantly moving with the waves caught his fascination, those perfect curves made his body shiver with excitement. He peered closer to have a look at the creature that caught his attention.

All he could see was a "Phoenix tattoo with Tamil script that said drowned to ashes and came out stronger" etched on that bare skin on her nape.
There was something about her that he couldn't take his eyes off her.
She created these unknown feeling inside him that he never knew existed. He wanted to knw her. WHo is she? What is she? What was this weird feeling that he is experiencing?
In this flow of emotions, he suddenly lost the sight of her. She was like a dream.  He waited for more than an hour, but she did not surface out of the waters. She was gone.

5 years later 

It was a typical arranged marriage scenario, the parents set up a "girl seeing date" they see her, like her, guy talks to girl.
It had become a mundane task for him. This arranged marriage "girl seeing" thing was not his scene.

The memory "tattoo girl" was locked away in some corner of his being.

He had met many girls, as a prospective bride, but none really caught his heart. His parents hoped, this time at least it would be different.

He hadst seen the girl picture, he just went out of obligation for his parents.
The moment he entered the house, a pretty girl in saree was ushered in with a tray laden with tea cups and sweets.
There was something familiar about this girl, drooping eyes, lazily moving hips, lips rosy red, something about this girl that reminded him of someone.
the girl turned to go into the kitchen, she had a tattoo on her nape that was faintly visible through the flow of her hair.
'He had seen that tattoo before! If only he could remember where"

He just knew, he had this nagging feeling in his head.
He requested, the parents permission to talk to this girl in private, with their permission he was led to the garden, where she sat with her back facing to him one a chair.

Like a bolt of lightening it struck him.
Its her. Its his beach girl. Its the Phoenix.Those inscriptions. It was as if it was a divine signal back then
He knew now. Its her, he had had finally got the girl of his dreams

That year, he got engaged and married, to "His tattoo girl"